Ahead of their tour next month, we caught up with The Beards’ John Beardman Jr to chat about touring and, unsurprisingly, beards. See what happened below!
Thanks for the interview! Can you introduce yourself and tell me a bit about the band?
We’re a bearded band that exclusively perform original songs about beards and how great it is to have a beard. We actually recently wrote our 58th song about beards.
Next month you will be playing some UK shows in support of your ten year anniversary – what can fans expect from one of these shows?
In the ten years we’ve existing as a beard-based propaganda rock band, beards have seen a massive global resurgence – which is something we take full credit for. So these shows will be a fervent celebration dedicated to the further glorification of beards. If you have a beard, expect to be publicly commended. If you don’t have a beard, you might want to consider wearing a fake one or expect to be publicly condemned.
What are you most looking forward to about the tour?
We feel so lucky to be able to travel the world spreading our fiercely pro-beard message. We just love having the opportunity to get up on stage in front of a beard-loving crowd, play some epic beard rock, celebrate beards and ostracise the beardless.
Is there any city or venue you’re most excited to play?
Beardchester is always a blast – but we enjoy playing wherever there are bearded or beard-curious people.
What do you like most about touring?
It seems like each time we go on tour, the world gets one step closer to the bearded utopia we’ve always dreamed of – a world where bearded people live together in peace and harmony, whilst being extended rights not extended to the beardless.
Is there anything about touring you don’t like?
I used to dislike touring because I would inevitability see people without beards at the airport or hotel lobby etc, but recently I have started wearing one of those sleeping masks from the aeroplane on the way to and from gigs so that helps. It does make it harder and slower to do almost everything else but it’s a small price to pay.
Any interesting stories from tours in the past?
The first time we played a gig in Glasgow we met a beardless young man who was unsure about beards at the start of our show but assured us after watching the show that he would grow a beard. The next time we visited Glasgow he was there right at the front with a really nice beard. He told us that his girlfriend had left him and he was getting in trouble at work. We told him to keep fighting the good fight. The last time we played we didn’t see him at the gig, but we assume he is now the Mayor of Glasgow.
And if you could tour with any band, who would it be and why?
We would probably tour with a super group made up of Billy Gibbons on guitar, Leland Sklar on bass and Santa Claus on Drums. But if all of their songs were not about beards, we would most likely spit the dummy, kick them off of the tour and dedicate the rest of our days to destroying Billy, Leland and Santa’s lives.
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DATES:
Wednesday 16 September: BRISTOL The Thekla
Thursday 17 September: NEWCASTLE Think Tank
Friday 18 September: GLASGOW King Tut’s Wah Wah Hut
Saturday 19 September: MANCHESTER Gorilla
Monday 21 September: NOTTINGHAM Rescue Rooms
Tuesday 22 September: BIRMINGHAM Temple
Wednesday 23 September: LONDON Dingwalls
Friday 25 September: BRIGHTON The Haunt
Saturday 26 September: SOUTHAMPTON Engine Rooms